Guide ยท Updated October 11, 2026
Declaration of intent wedding examples: the "I do" wording
The declaration of intent is the moment each partner says, in front of you and their guests, that they choose to marry. Here's where it goes in the ceremony, how to word it, and examples from traditional to modern.
On this page: What it is Where it goes Examples Questions
What the declaration of intent is
You ask each partner a question, and each answers it: usually "I do" or "I will". It's short, often under a minute, but it's one of the two moments with legal weight, because it's where the couple consents to the marriage in front of you. The other is the pronouncement.
Because of that, keep it unmistakable:
- Ask each partner separately, by name.
- Ask whether they take the other as their wife, husband or spouse, in plain words.
- Wait for a clear answer from each.
Rules about what a ceremony must include are set by each state. Ask the office that issues the couple's marriage license whether yours expects anything particular.
Where it goes in the ceremony
Most ceremonies put the declaration just before the vows: after the welcome, the couple's story and any readings, once everyone knows why they're there. Some officiants put it near the start instead, straight after the welcome. Either works; just keep it before the rings and the pronouncement.
Examples
Each example is the question for [Partner 1]. Ask [Partner 2] the same question, with the names swapped.
Customary
[Partner 1], do you take [Partner 2] to be your [wife / husband / spouse], to love and to cherish, from this day forward?
[Partner 1]I do.
This is the wording in our complete wedding ceremony script and in every ceremony kit we write.
Traditional
[Partner 1], do you take [Partner 2] to be your lawfully wedded [wife / husband / spouse], to have and to hold from this day forward, for better, for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, as long as you both shall live?
[Partner 1]I do.
Traditional, religious
[Partner 1], wilt thou have [Partner 2] to thy wedded [wife / husband], to live together after God's ordinance in the holy estate of Matrimony? Wilt thou love [her / him], comfort [her / him], honour, and keep [her / him] in sickness and in health; and, forsaking all other, keep thee only unto [her / him], so long as ye both shall live?
[Partner 1]I will.
Adapted from the Book of Common Prayer (1662). Churches have their own current forms, so a religious couple may want their tradition's wording instead.
Modern
[Partner 1], do you choose [Partner 2] to be your [wife / husband / spouse], your partner in everything, today and every day after?
[Partner 1]I do.
Short
[Partner 1], do you take [Partner 2] to be your [wife / husband / spouse]?
[Partner 1]I do.
Non-religious and warm
[Partner 1], do you take [Partner 2] to be your [wife / husband / spouse], to be their best friend and their biggest fan, and to build a life together, from this day on?
[Partner 1]I do.
"Have you come freely?"
Some ceremonies open the declaration by asking whether each partner has come of their own free will, before the "I do" question:
[Partner 1], have you come here today freely, to marry [Partner 2]?
[Partner 1]I have.
And do you take [Partner 2] to be your [wife / husband / spouse], from this day forward?
[Partner 1]I do.
Questions
Is the declaration of intent the same as the vows?
No. In the declaration the couple answer your question: yes, they want to marry. In the vows they make their own promises to each other, either in words they wrote or by repeating after you.
Can the couple answer together, "We do"?
Having each partner answer their own question makes each one's consent unmistakable, which is why most ceremonies do it that way. If the couple wants something different, check with the office that issues the license first.
Does it have to be "I do"?
"I do" and "I will" are the customary answers. What matters is a clear yes to a clear question. If your state expects particular words, the license office will tell you.
What about "Who gives this woman?"
That's a separate, optional moment, usually at the end of the processional. Some couples leave it out, or ask both families or all the guests whether they support the marriage, and everyone answers "We do."
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